Ever wonder what it feels like to make your first step into this world? Ever wonder what it feels like to make your first contact with another human being when you’re out of the womb? Or maybe, ever wonder how it feels when your heart stops abruptly, yet knowing that there are many things which you still yet to try.

I wonder how it feels, if it fall upon me, or the reaction of others towards me.

Do I feel pain? Do I feel fear, happy or sad?

How about the people around me?

My family members, my relatives, my close friends, my school mates, my colleagues; what would they feel?

It’s so hard to believe that this person came into the world; our world; and in 11 days of going through what a human does – breathe, hear, smell, probably feel and sight, her life just turned upside down like a tsunami that flooded Hawaii. Similar to demolishing the buildings in the town with a single wave, the nightmare had erased many wonderful dreams and memories that she could hardly remember in her tiny mind at that moment.

Attending to her at her bedside, nothing could describe how I felt. It was a sight of despair. Every breath taken in the room showed the determination of the many little ones who wants to live on. Sadly, she had given up.

When I first saw the young lady who had acknowledged the little one’s existence at the start of her birth, I thought she had shown some remorse for what had happened. Unfortunately; seeing is believing; and the young lady was as cheerful as ever, showing no concern to what had happened. She showed no instincts of a caretaker who would risk her life to protect the little one.

No words could describe the sadness that filled in my sympathetic heart to the little one but this sadness shortly turned into rage of anger when I discovered the actions of the young lady to be not genuine. Shame on her, and I felt like giving her a knock-out punch to ensure that her conscious was awake but nothing could be done. In my current position, I can’t.

I maybe emotional but seriously, a lesson was learnt. If you love someone, and you are willing to do anything with her, always take a step back, reflect. Reflect what others would think if you made an action to show how much you love, care or desire.

Most importantly, if you are not willing to give a damn about the outcome, please! Don’t let the innocent suffer. If you are ready and willing to do it and bear the consequences, then I have nothing to say but promised, not to hurt others in the process but learn to protect them, with your heart and soul.

For now, my prayers go to the little one; the little dove that heads to the Lord. I’m no Christian but I hope all goes well for her next adventure to life.