Just had my P.O.M. paper and its really... I dont know... To me, it was alright but when it comes to the Section C part, I was beating around the bush. Maybe I wasnt paying attention to the keywords written on the question paper but what I know is that, in my mind, I wish I could just complete the stupid paper as soon as possible. Done with it and that's it!! Hmm... Think I was having some system breakdown, probably a mental breakdown. Tomorrow would be A.F.A., the worst module that I could past. I could score 24/25 for the first ICA and 12/25 for the second ICA. Amazing...

Anyway, like it or not, I gonna pass the whole Sport and Wellness Management diploma. No matter what, I must not fail any modules. This is the basic criteria for me to ensure that I could get a place where I really want to go. N.I.E... I think its quite easy to say but its quite hard to enter if my scores are not up to the standard. The dream of going to N.I.E. seems to be drifting further away from me each day but there's no time to think too much about that, exams are still in progress. No time for slacking and no time for sleep. Alright... I think i'm just crapping all over here... Sorry people... I'm just getting tired and I'm trying to keep myself awake, to prepare for my revision later, as well as remembering all the important points for A.F.A..

Before stopping my post, Diana, just a few words, or papragraphs to you, there's no need to apologise. Well, maybe you have problems telling me how you feel and what you think about certain issues, or probably, I'm always snatching your lines whenever we have a short period of time to chat while in school. Haha... Anyway, just look at the bright side of life. Everyone, even me, would want to get away from alot of things; studies, stress, homework, exams, parents' nagging, etc... Many many more. However, we cant escape from reality. We still need to face it no matter what.

Seriously, I could be, again, talking crap to you but one thing is for sure, I would not allow you to quit school so easily. Even if your parents allow, I wont allow. Haha... I dont wish you have such negative thoughts as its not good for your health and studies. Believe me, the more you think about quitting, the more you feel that studies is a total waste of time. Now, I dont want this to happen to you. Therefore, please dont make yourself sick. You're already that weak (health), plus the injuries and blah blah blah... I think you should rest more instead than falling sick.

Please dont hate yourself too. If you hate yourself that you are not able to communicate with others and you cant take the stress at home, well, there are other things to destress. I know you wont do stupid things like cutting wrists or whatever but I hope you could just do things that could stop your imagination from running while. Cutting wrist is really a stupid idea, and I mean it. Why would you hurt yourself by cutting yourself, rather than just learn extra cultery lessons and learn how to slice the fish, chicken, duck, vegetables and any kind of food??!!! At least you can destress by cooking and you can learn something new in life!! OMG!! Oops... not refering to you, Diana... LOL!!

If it comes to hating oneself, then I should hate myself more than anybody. That's because I could not help the people around me and if I could help myself, isnt that too selfish. For me, I always want to do wonders. If today I'm not a Sport and Wellness Management student, I would be considering of being a nurse, if possible. It sounds hard and totally gay but saving a person's life is a worthwhile thing to do. Saving a friend's life is the most precious thing you would want to do. Yet, I cant do that now... They say, 'Friends do come and go..' I believe in that but I always never expect them to be gone and gone forever. Thus, I treasure everyone in my life, even you and others... Hence, no hating of yourself please. You can hate 'Diana - the keyboard or monitor' but not the human... Okay??!!

Its hard to treasure a friend, especially when both of us are totally in opposite worlds. Your's in Secondary school and mine in the Polytechnic. However, I dont mind going for the extra mile to help others, as well as having a better understanding for each other. Anyway, next time, if you want to scream, give me a SMS, see if I'm in Sembwang or not. I can accompany you to the drain next your your flat and start screaming like retards. Haha... Anyway, smile gal... There's nothing that could make your life so miserable. Stay positive at times...

While for me, let me be the robot that you always know; the one who wont sleep at all, the one who wont feel any feelings. The one who allows you to scold if you feel sad or angry, the one who would still be bringing you a smile even if its the end of the world. From the so-call 'Doctor of smilez...' Nic... :)