When a piece of news is spread, the first thing you will ask yourself is whether that is a prank or not. However, when you check back to reality and realized that it was a fact, you will be asking yourself, how would you accept this piece of news…

“…一句话掉一滴泪, 今晚的我会是如何入睡…”

- JJ林俊杰　（原来）

This song was written by my favourite singer and composer, JJ Lin, and this piece of lyrics describes my feelings at that period of time. It’s hard to console myself while talking on the phone with Kian Wee as tears just flow out like a totally-filled dam had an explosion, with its water gushing through its gate, flooding the city with great destruction. Of course, the destruction for me is not getting myself being soaked with tears but the acceptance of the bad news.

The first phone call came when I was on the way back to the gym with my lunch pack. Eugene was the one through the phone, and when he told me the news, I thought it was a joke. He told me to check the papers and I could feel that he was serious after all.

From a slow pace to full speed, I ran all the way to the North Canteen and buy the newspaper to look out for any news. I failed to see any news and called back again. Yet, this time, the news was harsher then ever. I could not believe in it and decided to call the person with the main source; Kian Wee. Indeed, it was true, and I kneeled down, with my fists clenched and I folded my arms as I cried softly at the pathway, while the rest of the students were having their examinations on the first storey.

Never would I believe that this would happen. A true comrade of Class 5N3 has fallen; who was rumored to have plunged to his death. The reason behind for his actions still remains a mystery. Mates of mine in the gym consoled me as I cried out loud when I was at the gym balcony. The feeling was terrible and I just could not hide it when V.J. was talking to me. I tried to call the rest of my classmates from my Secondary School to inform them about the news… Some able to get through, some couldn’t.

Once lesson was over in the gym, I was kept busy with all the messaging and calls from friends as we prepared to gather together to see our beloved friend. When everyone was at the wake, I was just controlling my tears, like what Kian Wee was doing for the entire evening. I could see the brave image that the Mum of my fallen comrade was putting on, while the Dad seems to be at a relax manner but seems to not accepting the fact at all.

I was the first one to lead the group to the wake, also the first one to plant the incense joist stick on the pot, with his picture placed in front of my very own eyes. I feel like crying but still holding back. Everyone was discussing about the cause of his death while we gathered on the table. Harsh but true; he’s gone and will not be back anymore.

We waited and more people came. Schoolmates such as Kenny, Jun Yao, Sion and many more had turned up. Mr Siva and a few teachers had turned up. Ms Lee was there too, which was a shocking thing. We just had a greeting of hellos and never talked much. I guess it was not a good idea to talk about any stuff about academics, especially when the fallen comrade of ours was once her promising student, who has a great prospect of attaining high achievements in life.

Well, once everything was done, with the waiting for 3 hours for all friends of ours to turn up, some of us went for a dinner at Thomson Road, which was Prata. It was tasty but when Eugene asked me if I’m ready to delete his number, I just could not do it. Maybe it was not the time to put it aside or maybe, I just can’t put it aside. Once dinner was over, it was time for home and to get some rest.

I hope tomorrow will be a better day, for everyone close to me. It lets me understand how important life is to me, especially loving the ones close to you. That is why I don’t have any close friends in my heart, as everyone around me is the ones I cherished. Regrets are the part and parcel of life but whether to move on, that is the only question that I have not decided in my mind.

When people leave us, it will be the memories that we had together that stayed. While for this friend of mine, the scars and pain will make me remember him. He’s the one who caused me a fractured tailbone, the one who teaches me History when I’ve difficulties in class, the one who will be motivating me when I’m doing Trigonometry for Maths lesson, the one who will always be the boss of the class with huge strength, the one who knows I like singing a lot and calling me a “Singapore Idiot” all the time… the one… the only one…

I have enough of crying and once tonight’s over, I will be a better person and move on with things that are right now in its state. I guess this Friday’s soccer will be getting more friends of ours to come over and play with. As Eugene and I had suggested among us, the games we played will be a tribute to our dear friend in Heaven. All goals will still be counted in the Tally but what matters most is, we play hard, we score hard and we win hard, just for you. =]

For now, its time to rest and lastly, to the fallen comrade of 5N3, who’s pen is always mightier than the sword, rest in peace. I hate to say this though this might sound gay to you but Dude, I love you!! Rest well…